Being Old Is Good

If you read my first post, you noticed that I admited right up front that I’m old. I have reached the ripe old age of 55, which was considered practically on death’s doorstep when I was a child. My husband Ron is about to turn forty-nine, and he thinks he’s old (really, he’s just a spring chicken.) But frankly, I don’t feel old.

In fact, I often have to stop and remind myself of my age, because in my mind I’m still a twenty-something. I sometimes find myself surprised that I am the mother of a twenty-five years old son, and a twenty-one years old son, and a nineteen years old son. Gee, how did they grow up so quickly?  They were just little kids when my husband, Ron, and I married.

My husband and I married 10 years ago. Both of us had gone through very bitter divorces. We first met in karate class at the local YMCA and just sort of acknowledged each other’s existence for a couple of years. We actually only dated for a few months before deciding to marry and blend our families. Our boys got along well from the beginning and are still very close. In a way, this relationship was like starting life all over, being a kid again.  New love, new family, new life.

We had both learned a lot from our first marriages, so this time around we knew what pitfalls to avoid. We didn't expect each other to be mind readers. We spoke up if something bothered us or if we needed the other to do something. We talked before spending large sums of money. We made sure all our boys knew their new parent (Ron for my boys, I for his son) was an authority figure in our home. It was like we had always been married. There were no wasted hours of anger or the silent treatment.  

We also had more reasonable expectations of each other than we had had of our first spouses. I knew Ron was a pastor, and that we would never be rich. He knew I had a law degree but had found practicing law a bad career choice. I would not be going back into a courtroom again.  We didn't expect to change or mold each other into our personal vision of perfect. We took each other as we were, warts and all.

We have had a few bumps along the way, but Ron and I have a great marriage. We love spending time with each other. Staying home and watching TV is cool with us. We don’t need huge sums of money because we have most anything we need (or want.) We don’t need to go out every weekend because we’re not bored by home or each other. Friday night is date night, spent sitting in bed cuddling and watching our favorite movies. We are content.

And it’s all because we are old. All those life lessons combined to create in us the ability to avoid old errors, and enjoy new life. So yes, being old is good.

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